There I was. Sitting in the front seat of my minivan, when my oldest daughter said THE words I NEVER thought I’d hear her say.
We stopped at the Circle K for an ice-cold Polar Pop. It was Memorial Day and, since school was out, she joined me for my daily ritual. We filled our cups with delicious pellet ice and our favorite soda. After sealing the lids and pushing in the straws, we sipped our drinks as we walked to the register.
We placed them on the counter as the cashier rang it up. I reached the screen to enter my phone number (Sip-n-Save members get a free drink every day for 30 days), but the screen wasn’t working. With every number I touched, a different number displayed. I commented to the cashier about it. She tried in vain to fix it from her side. So, I smiled and told her I was up for the challenge.
My daughter watched as I intently touched the screen over and over. It was not easy, but I giggled as I struggled with each digit. Soon my phone number was displayed and I hit enter. I cheered with a “Yes” as I raised my arms triumphantly in the air. Even the cashier joined in my celebration. She smiled at my joy. As my daughter and I turned to leave, I noticed the growing line of customers. Their scowls and smirks said it all. “Oh, I’m sorry that took so long, but it was SO much FUN!” I apologized as we left the store, grinning from ear to ear.
Upon getting in the van, I expected my daughter to tell me how embarrassed she was. How weird I am. How I talk to too many people. That I’m too friendly. That I’m too happy. I thought that’s what she’d say because that’s what she’s said for years.
But then, before I could even put the van in reverse, she looked at me and said, “Mom, I want to be JUST like you.“ 💗
And that’s when my heart skipped a beat. Everything froze. I became still. And motionless. Words escaped me. I was in shock.
‘She wants to be like me? Is something wrong with her?’
Finally, “Say what!?!?” sarcastically popped out of my mouth.
She looked at me and said, “Ya, I want to be like you. I want to have fun when I go places. I want to be friendly and optimistic like you are. I want to talk to people and make them laugh. I like that about you, mom.”
Chills rushed up my arms and down my spine. THIS was a moment I wanted to cherish and always remember. I wanted to memorize her words, her smile, her sincerity. And I wanted to remind myself that THIS was from a daughter who for YEARS had done nothing but complain about me. Complain when I was ‘chitty chatty’ with friends. Complain when I bonded with strangers. Complain AND leave Target to sit in the car when I sang and danced to the music down the aisles. And maybe even went so far as to inspire other moms to join me. Just maybe. 😉
Yes, this was a moment I wanted to treasure. And treasure always. My oldest daughter — 17 going on 18, book-loving, editor-in-chief of her high school newspaper, soon-to-be senior — wants to be like me. She WANTS to be like me. 🥰
My friend, over the years I’ve been fine-tuning my parenting style. Maximizing my influence. And magnifying my impact. THIS is what it’s culminated in – a powerful connection with my daughter. A bond that’s magnetized her to me. I’ve created what most mothers believe happens only in fairy tales. And still, it’s my real life. It’s my lived experience. I’ve mastered the art of raising and connecting with teens. It’s my superpower. Some of my clients think it’s voodoo or magic 🤣, but it’s not. It’s just skills. Skills I’ve acquired that I can teach you in my upcoming CONNECTeen group. You will want to join me. In one short year, my daughter will be moving out. Every moment matters. Every moment counts. I will love and cherish each and every one.
